


Romantic Entanglement

by lizinnia



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Fix-It, Friends to Lovers, Hug Scene (Sherlock: The Lying Detective), M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-24
Updated: 2018-10-24
Packaged: 2019-08-07 03:06:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16400171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizinnia/pseuds/lizinnia
Summary: Sherlock sighed. “As I think I have explained to you many times before, romantic entanglement, while fulfilling for other people-”“Would complete you as a human being.”(I think we all know where this is going...)





	Romantic Entanglement

Sherlock sighed. “As I think I have explained to you many times before, romantic entanglement, while fulfilling for other people-”

 

“Would complete you as a human being.”

 

“That doesn’t even mean anything,” Sherlock retorted.

 

“Just text her. Phone her. Do something while there’s still a chance because that chance doesn’t last forever. Trust me, Sherlock. It’s gone before you know it. Before. You. Know it,” John scolded.

 

“I don’t want to.”

 

“And why bloody not? She’s smart. She’s beautiful. She’s into you. She’s-”

 

“A woman.”

_I finally said it. What will he think? Will he…no. If John Watson says it’s all fine, then it’s all fine. At least I won’t have to deal with his accusations and…jealousy? ever again._

 

“Yes, I know. She’s The Woman. The only woman that ever really mattered, the-”

 

_Oh, dear God._

“ _A_ woman, John. _A_ woman,” Sherlock pressed, looking at John in the eyes hoping, pleading, that he’d understand.

 

_Wait... did he just…what? He’s…_

“Oh.” Johns eyebrows raised, his face becoming less tense. “So... you mean…” John hesitated.

 

“Yes,” Sherlock pressed.

 

_How have I never…_

“Right, ahem, well still.” John tugged at his button down and straightened his back. “You have a chance to find someone and be with them. Mine is over.”

 

“No, I don’t.”

 

“Yes, you do,” John insisted. “You just don’t give anyone a chance.”

 

“Mine ended long ago,” Sherlock murmured, his eyes drifting towards the window.

 

“And what exactly do you mean by that?” John quipped.

 

_I just said that. Out loud. To John. Stupid. Stupid!_

“Nothing. Forget it. See you tomorrow, John.”

 

“No. No, you don’t get to do that,” John demanded.

 

“Do what?”

 

“I say all that. I tell you everything. And you close yourself off?”

_We are finally talking. If it ends now I don’t know if I can bring this up again._

 

“I... I can’t,” Sherlock urged.

 

“Please, Sherlock. We have to be better. For her. For us.” John clenched his left fist, his arms straight at his side.

 

_How do I get out of this? What lie could I possibly tell? He will know I’m fibbing. He will know there can’t possibly be anyone else. He knows I only have one friend._

Sherlock stood there shaking his head, running his hands through his hair, pulling. “I. Can’t. John...please.”

 

“Right, well then I better get back to Rosie. See you tomorrow.” John pivoted towards the door and began walking.

 

_Stupid! John finally opens up to me and I can’t reciprocate? What kind of friend am I? The word ‘friend’ sounded scathing, burning into the back of his mind. How will our friendship ever be fixed if I can’t talk to him? …How will it be fixed if I do? Sherlock gulped. There’s still so much to say. I don’t need to say all of it now; I can’t. But maybe I can show him…_

“Wait,” Sherlock urged. “I need to show you something.”

 

John turned back around. “Okay then, what is it?” John questioned.

 

Sherlock's fingers reached up to the buttons of his shirt, shaking and scrambling to undo them. John’s hand reflexively moved to his eyes as he turned his head away. “Jesus, Sherlock what are you-”

 

“John.”

 

The sternness of Sherlock’s voice snapped John out of his flustered state. “Ahem, right.”

 

Sherlock looked unlike himself as he pulled at his buttons. He was unsteady, unhinged.

 

“Well, what is it? I’ve seen your torso before,” John jabbed.

 

Sherlock took a deep, unsteady breath, dropped his shirt and dressing gown to the floor, and turned around, his head lowered. His face hidden.

 

John took a step back, his hand grasping at his mouth and pulling at the side of his jaw. His eyes dashed around every raised line on Sherlock’s back. “Jesus, Sherlock,” he whispered. Suddenly he felt his whole body boiling. “What case could possibly be worth this?” he sneered, his left fist clenching and unclenching rhythmically.

 

“Yours,” Sherlock blurted. He began quickly covering himself back up and re-buttoning his shirt.

 

“I-I don’t understand,” John stammered.

 

“Clearly.”

 

“When...how?”

_I should have been there._

 

“When I was...gone,” Sherlock explained. He turned around to face John, his head too heavy to lift up and look at him.

 

“Explain, Sherlock. Right. Now,” John choked.

 

“Moriarty...there were snipers when I was on the roof. I had to jump or…” Sherlock paused.

 

“They’d shoot me,” John registered.

 

“That’s why I had to die, John. That’s why you had to think...If they realized you weren’t mourning they might have...”

 

“Shit. Yea. Okay,” John sighed. “But what does this have to do with…” he motioned vaguely at Sherlock with his hand.

 

Sherlock stiffened, managing the strength to raise his head to read John’s face as he talked. “When I was away I needed to destroy Moriarty’s web. I couldn’t risk coming back to Baker Street until this was done in case there was a chance that… well I’m sure you can deduce that on your own. So I spent two years wandering the world, dismantling pieces of the web one by one until...Serbia. I’m sure you can-” he gestured vaguely back at John.

 

“So, all of this was for me?” John marveled, meeting Sherlock’s eyes with his own.

 

“Yes,” Sherlock breathed.

 

_Two years. Sherlock was forced to leave for two years on a never-ending case. I’m sure he loved the entertainment. But he never eats on a case, never sleeps. How far did he go in ruining himself? Did he spend two years barely alive scrambling to dismantle the network? Not allowing himself time to heal? Did he resort to old habits? He risked his life over and over until… God. And all this for… me? He could have just started a life elsewhere undercover. Sherlock does love his disguises. Was all that worth staying in London?_

“But...why? Why do all this just to come back to Baker Street with me? I’m sure there are plenty of other cases elsewhere,” John challenged.

 

_Your turn. You tell me._

“Why are you here?” Sherlock asked.

 

“Wh-what?” John replied, cocking his head.

 

“Why are you here? Why are you watching over me? Why do you care about my drug use? Why did you save me?” Sherlock demanded.

 

“Because you’re my best friend,” John stated incredulously.

 

“I faked being dead for two years. I’m an addict with an overactive trigger finger. I almost shot our landlady, John. I tried to stab a man with a scalpel and no proof of his guilt,” Sherlock rambled. “Your wife died for me. I got cocky. And before you go on saying none of that was my fault or it was for a case or whatever it may be, we both know that humans are much more complicated than that and I am a flawed man. I am insufferable, stubborn, rude, inhuman at times. So please, why are you here?”

 

John stared at him in shock. “I told you. You’re my best friend.”

 

“I don’t know much about people, John, but I do know that most people would stop being friends with someone after all...that,” Sherlock retorted.

 

“But you... I…” John tried, stumbling to find the words, looking into himself finally begin to realize... He’s right.

_Most friends wouldn’t. But of course, I’m here. How could I not be? I can’t just leave him forever. He’s all I have left… and even if he is a prick I haven’t been a great friend to him either, that’s for sure. We’re both flawed but we get on together. I can’t imagine not ever going on a case again, never listening to his deductions, watching him fill with pride when he solves it, laughing with him… God, I…_

“I don’t know,” he stated.

 

Sherlock took a deep breath and looked at John in the eyes. “John, I need you to make one more deduction,” he implored, his heart racing, his hands becoming ice cold, nausea building up as the room began to spin. “Please.”

 

John stared at him frozen for what felt like an eternity, their eyes unable to retreat each other’s gaze.

_He’s gay. He thinks he will never love (again?) because his time is up. When did this time begin? He killed for me. He was tortured for me. He died for me. And I… I can’t ever let him go. I tried, and I just can’t._

 

John inhaled deeply and began to walk closer to Sherlock.

 

Sherlock remained frozen, every muscle in his body stuck in place as John grabbed him by the nape of his neck and pulled him in.

Their lips met, brushing gently, hesitantly, Sherlock’s barely moving, his body unable to catch up with his mind as John’s parted lips pushed against his own.

_John._

 

John let go of Sherlock and stepped back to observe his face. His heart was racing as well as his thoughts as he wondered if he made a terrible mistake. Sherlock was completely unmoving, paralyzed. John had no idea of wondering if this was a good thing. He wanted to run, to walk out, go home to Rosie, but he knew if he did he could never come back. He could never face Sherlock after this. So he waited.

 

Sherlock came to after several drawn-out moments, overly aware that he was being scrutinized by John. John who just kissed him.

 

“So you...:” Sherlock began.

 

“Yes, you git,” John stated.

 

“And you…”

 

“Oh God, yes,” Sherlock proclaimed.

 

John reached around Sherlock’s neck feverishly, bringing him closer once more.

**Author's Note:**

> I originally wrote this without any of the italic bits cause I was trying to make it all subtext but I thought it was too confusing to follow without seeing why the characters acted the way they did....now I think it's too confusing because the POV keeps changing suddenly lol. I tried to make it less confusing by spacing it out all weird and now it's confusing and ugly! But it's okay I'll just leave it at that. This is my first fic it's supposed to be bad. Thanks for reading!


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